The Danger the Church Must Put Down

A Small Scene That Says Something Bigger

Every parent knows the moment. A toddler picks up something they should never be holding. Perhaps it is a knife left too close to the edge of the counter, scissors, a lighter, and grins as if they’ve found a treasure. You drop to their eye level, keep your voice calm even though your heart is pounding, and say: “Give it to me. Let go.” And the child, not understanding the danger, holds on tighter. “No. Mine.”

It’s a small scene, but it captures something bigger than parenting. It’s what it looks like when someone is holding on to danger they can’t see, while someone who loves them is pleading for them to let go.

I believe that’s the position God is in with His Church in America right now. He is pleading with us, His children, to let go of a knife we have been holding for a very long time: the knife of partiality.

A Problem We Admit but Won’t Release

Most Christians in America will admit that partiality is a real problem, one this country has never fully escaped since its founding. Few of us would argue otherwise. And yet knowing something is a problem and actually letting go of it are two very different things. Complacency, misunderstanding, fear, and simple exhaustion with the subject keep us gripping the handle. We tell ourselves other issues are more pressing. We look away.

But the Church is supposed to be the one place where this kind of leadership shows up first, not last. So where is it?

Why This Fight Matters So Much

Here is the question I think every believer has to sit with: do we actually understand that partiality among God’s people is deadly to God’s purposes on earth? Not inconvenient. Not embarrassing. Deadly. Without addressing it, the Church in America cannot move in the direction God intends for it. Without winning this war, the Church cannot glorify God the way it’s meant to. Instead, it risks becoming exactly what its harshest critics already say it is: a group of hypocrites who preach unity on Sunday and live segregated the rest of the week.

So, are we preparing to win this war? Are we willing to do the work? Are we willing to let go of the knife and cross the lines that divide us?

As Christians, our answer has to be yes. Not “yes, eventually.” Not “yes, when it’s convenient.” Yes, now.

My Own Slow Journey to Letting Go

I say this as someone who hasn’t always believed it. There was a long stretch of my life when I didn’t want to cross those lines either. I didn’t fully realize I was holding something dangerous, and between my own ignorance, anger, and fear, I wasn’t ready to let go. It took God working through His Word, patiently and repeatedly, to show me what I was holding and why it mattered so much that I put it down. That process wasn’t quick, and it wasn’t easy. But it has been covered, every step of it, by the grace of God, and I’m grateful for that grace even now.

Three Things You Need to Hear

So let me ask you directly, the way I had to ask myself. Are you a Christian who is openly holding on to the knife of partiality? Or have you tucked it into your back pocket instead, not sure whether you’re really ready to let it go for good? Maybe you’ve decided that because your hands aren’t visibly on the knife, the problem must not be yours to solve, or that it has simply gone away on its own.

If any of that describes you, Scripture and experience point us toward three truths we cannot afford to ignore.

First, this knife has never been safe to hold. Not for you, and not for the people around you who bear its cost.

Second, ignoring it will not make it disappear. Problems like this don’t dissolve quietly; they wait, and they do damage while they wait.

Third, God wants you to let it go. Not manage it. Not explain it away. Let it go.

That’s the invitation behind this reflection, and behind the broader message I’ve carried for years through my book, Cross Colors: American Christianity in Black and White, which challenges Christians to confront partiality in the Church rather than manage it or wait for it to pass: to see partiality for the danger it truly is, to trust God with what it costs to release it, and to actually do the work of crossing the lines that have kept the Church divided for far too long.

What Letting Go Actually Looks Like

The child in that opening scene didn’t know the knife could hurt him. He just knew it was his, and he wasn’t ready to give it up. We don’t have that excuse. We know better. The only question left is whether we’re willing to let go.

Letting go doesn’t happen because we suddenly feel brave enough. It happens the way it did for me: slowly, imperfectly, and only because God kept showing up in the process. Start smaller than you think you need to. Have an honest conversation with someone outside your usual circle. Ask God, plainly, to show you what you’ve been holding without realizing it. None of that requires certainty about how the whole issue gets resolved in this country or in the wider Church. It only requires a willingness to open your hand.

This is ultimately a spiritual problem, not a political one to be managed or a cultural debate to be won. God isn’t asking the Church to draft the perfect policy. He’s asking His children to put down what we’ve been clutching and trust Him with what happens next, and that starts with leaders and members alike, not one or the other.

So, wherever you find yourself today, openly holding on, quietly unsure, or convinced the problem already solved itself, consider this an invitation to look again. The knife is still there. It has been the whole time. The future witness of the Church may depend less on the statements we make and more on the partiality we’re finally willing to surrender.

About the Author

Pastor Haman Cross, Jr.Pastor Thrive, Regional Representative DetroitHaman Cross Jr. is Pastor Emeritus of Rosedale Park Baptist Church in Detroit and serves as Pastor Thrive’s Regional Representative for Detroit/Wayne County. Over five decades of ministry, he has preached across five continents and in 48 states, and has served as a chaplain to the NBA, NFL, and MLB as well as a speaker for Promise Keepers. Today he mentors pastors and churches through leadership transitions and champions cross-cultural partnerships within the Church. He and his wife, Roberta, have three children, seven grandchildren, and one great-grandson.

Further Reading

Readers who want to go deeper into this topic can find Haman Cross Jr.’s book, Cross Colors: American Christianity in Black and White, available through major booksellers.